Tuesday, November 29, 2011

T-Day Over

A few things to consider. Last weekend Racer and I went and saw the Muppet movie. It was great. Now, if you are all things Muppets then I’m sure you already have your own Muppet Whatnot, but if you don’t then I suggest you get busy.

Now, far be it for me to think too deeply into something simple, but I couldn’t stop thinking about the love story of Kermit and Miss/Mrs/Ms??? Piggy. First off, are they even married? I vaguely recall a wedding scene in Muppets Take Manhattan, but according to a 2011 interview with Jimmy Kimmel the answer is no. NO?!? And this makes we wonder if they should really be celebrated as a couple. Seriously, the guy has been dating her for my entire life and they have had more fake weddings than Kim Kardashian and Britney Spears combined. The frog doesn’t need to commit because he gets the bacon for free…or so it seems. This sad love saga is equally as poor a message as Eminem and Rihanna’s Love The Way You Lie. What kind of example is this for young children?

So, last week I managed a few runs up in the crisp Colorado air. It sucked. My attempts to simulate low oxygen high altitude conditions by running in place in our steam packed bathroom failed to adequately do the job and after one mile I was praying for an angry mountain goat
to attack me and end my misery. There were none. Where have all the good goats gone?

I’m slowing getting back into running shape, but I’m enjoying the blessed struggle. As the winter slowly builds its momentum, preparing for its annual months of occupation, I’m feeling the urge to run more and more. It always amazes me how my desire to run waxes and wanes, and how other loves such as reading do the same—thereby creating a life where different passions rise and fall in such a way that one is always blooming as another begins its hibernation.

Wednesday, November 16, 2011

Winners and Unwinners*

So, Nitmos’ enemy is going to be speaking today at Playmakers. Sadly, I’ll be working and unable to attend. But, as they say, the enemy of my enemy is my friend.** And there are few things I’d like to see more than old Mr. Dick Beardsley try to physically and emotionally intimidate my former neighbor. Or to see Nitmos dismount from his majestic honey-soaked unicorn. Boy I would love to see two of the worlds coolest men square off. This title bout would be bigger than the Dos Equis man and Chuck Norris’ 23 day intergalactic and multidimensional battle. The crisscross of lasers and daggers and armies of monkeys was epic.

Very quickly, the list to top five showdowns of all time are as follows:

5. Merlin v Madam Mim
4. The guys (or girls) from here…
3. KITT v KARR
2. Brussels Sprouts v Asparagus
1. Dos Equis Dude v Chuck Norris

But tonight’s showdown has the potential to best them all. Remember, there can be only one man to enter and two to live immortally…or have I crossed my 80s movies up a tad. Regardless, I wish I could attend.

Also, I’d like to congratulate One Crazy Penguin as my winter giveaway. Amazingly, BoB was the randomly drawn winner, but she indicated she didn’t need any of this cool stuff. So, One Crazy Penguin, please send me an email with your address and I’ll get it off to you.


*Unwinners you may ask. Well, if 'un' is simply a prefix for 'not' then unwinner should be self evident, inconventional as it may seem.
** But the question remains, who is my enemy and who is the enemy of my enemy…

Monday, November 7, 2011

Giving It All Away...Almost

Seriously, Phil Collins suggested you just throw it all away, but that isn’t very environmentally friendly now it is. Not that the Brits are all that eco-friendly as it is…thank you very much industrial revolution. Cuz you know I know baby, that it is much better to give it away.

As winter approaches, post-work runs become ‘night runs.’ And few things are more depressing than going to work when it is dark outside and leaving work at 6pm and it is still dark dark again.

Now who will light up the darkness? Who will hold your hand? Well, if you win my giveaway, then you can light up the night with this Nike reflective vest!* You will shine like a beacon of hope as you slice the long hours of darkness. Sadly, I'm unable to help with the whole hand holding problem you have.

And memories will remind you that running on ice and snow is difficult. So the giveaway winner will also get a pair of ICEtrekkers. Sure, Yak Trax get all the glory, but these are way cooler—based entirely on anecdotal evidence and no actual field testing. But they are free so what do you care if they last a week.

Not so sure you are sold on entering my giveaway. How about this? What if I throw in two new Chocolate Raspberry Roctane Gu packets. All you have to do is leave a comment. And if that is too much work then I sure hope you don’t find yourself running at dusk, thinking about how much you really wished you had a Gu to help you through the last few miles of your run when you slip on some ice and then a car tragically runs you over because they never saw you crumpled on the ground. All of that can be avoided by leaving a comment…but only for one of you.

* Disclaimer: First, if you are engaged to me, you can't win. Second, the vest is a L/XL. If you are small, like Racer, then it won’t fit you. But it is still free. The ICEtrekkers are also a size L (M: 9.5 to 12.5; W: 10.5 +). But if you have smaller feet and you win then let me know and I’ll exchange them for a size that fits you.