Rails to Trails Does Not Equal Trail Running
Working title of post: ASPtJoF (Ass Stomped Plus the Joy of
Falling)
Last weekend I ventured onto the Poto Trail as recommended
by a few fellow runners.FN1 This was my
first ever trail run unless you count running through my neighborhood, cutting
through backyards, running through a house, and using a trampoline to bounce
over a fence to get home before my sister.
Seriously, I’ve never tried anything like trail
running. My several jaunts on Rails to
Trails paths were useless as preparation.
The dramatic changes in incline, the unending altering of the trail from
large rocks to partially unearthed roots to sand, the narrowness of the path,
and the poison ivy was a lot to deal with for my first trail run. So it figures I insisted on doing the entire
17.5M loop my first time out.
Only, I went about 18.4M. The trail is well marked—sorta. I’m sure if I had gone with another runner
familiar with the trail I could have avoided my several ‘lost’ moments; minutes
standing in the middle of a three way intersection and attempting to recall the
many tracking stills I’d developed growing up in the burbs. The Poto Trail, while beautiful at times, can
be confusing when a cross country skiing trail cuts across your trail and there
are no signs to really indicate which way is correct. Still, I muttered my way through. Even more confusing is when you arrive at a
fork in the trail and the large tree you encounter has a large red arrow
pointing right. Why is that
confusing? Because the large red arrow
takes you off the actual path. Here is
my hint, if you find yourself on the Poto Trail and you hit said fork in the
trail, ignore that particular arrow unless you want to find a parking lot.
To make things worse, I tripped several times and ‘ate dirt’
twice—hard. Admittedly, by the last five
miles the best I could do was walk a quarter, run a quarter. I was exhausted. The canopy protected me from baking in the
high 80s sun, but the warm temps combined with my 10M run in 85+ degree temps
the evening before made this even more daunting than I ever imagined. At times there was no recourse but to walk
parts because running was too dangerous.
Anybody willing to ride that trail—and several bikers passed me—is
insane.
I was half expecting to run into Jareth the Goblin King and
half expecting I’d found myself in Escher’s Ascending Staircase. When I emerged I let out a triumphant but
minimally audible “yeah!”FN2
Things I learned: Trail running has nothing to do with road
running. They are about as related as
people are to gibbons. Any attempt to
trace some form of common ancestry between the two is blasphemy. There are dangers in the woods equal to that
of red hooded little girls. Never run a
difficult and unfamiliar trail alone; or at least don’t make a practice out of
it. My cell phone works while in the
woods but if you call me I may not be my usual pleasant self.FN3 And finally, ordering a pizza and asking it
be delivered to you at post number 11 on the Poto Trail is about as useless as
calling the local Domino’s pizza in Muskegon and asking them to deliver a pizza
to your 100 foot sailboat heading north to Ludington simply because you are on
the night watch and bored and surprised you are getting service out on Lake
Michigan.
FN1: Thanks In Steph’s Shoes (I think) and congrats to Steph
and her family for adding a new future long distance runner to the clan.
FN2: Purposely left uncapitalized for effect.
FN3: Sorry my love.